I found a charm today. It was one of those square charms with initials on them, The kind you put on friendship bracelets. The letter was an S. I bought it when I first started working at Hobby Lobby. I bought it because I was crazy in love with this boy who’s name began with an S.
It makes me laugh now to think about the impulse I had to buy that. We were apart at the time, still a couple, but living in two different states. I was walking by the charms one day, and I saw the S, and I bought it. I put it in a special box… along with a heart pendant he bought me. It’s still on its card, I didn’t really have any intentions with it, other than the fact that it had an S.
I am a different person now. I’m With a different man, but that girl, who bought the S because it reminded her of her lover, she’s still a huge part of who I am too.
Imagine what it would be like, had I never been her? I certainly wouldn’t be where I am today… who I am today. I gave of my heart in complete trust that if he tired of having it, he would give it back to me gently. What a fool I was, but I learned from that lesson… just as many mistakes I’d made before that… and the mistakes I’d watched other make.
I often wonder, if one day we’re given the power to go back and change one thing in our lives, how many people would accept that gift. If you changed the fact that you did drugs in 1988, maybe you would’ve just ended up a store manager, instead of a judge.
Would you be willing to give up having a child, just to have a ex-lover be erased from your passed?
I wonder……